My Boy Giving Me A Scare

Friday, February 24th started out as any normal day around our house did.

Kids built forts, danced to music or threw tantrums. 

(Not necessarily in that order!)

But entertainment was definitely promised somehow, someway!

 

But after I got done with some pretty intense duties around the house, one of which was getting the inventory of our household furniture and their condition documented and driven up to John's work and then three unhappy attention-starved children later...well, let's just say they were just kids being kids. Eating lunch seemed to help retrieve their once smiles and happy selves. Landon was napping and Jocelyn and Andrew went upstairs to play. Normal everyday happenings!

I was taking a quick break when Jocelyn came bouncing down the stairs at full speed screaming, "mama mama mama...HELP!!!!! Andrew NEEEEDS you!!!!!!" I then heard the loudest and most scary cry I have ever heard from Andrew. My heart raced as I flew up the stairs! My imagination ran wild. I was afraid to see what happened and not sure what to expect. Once I spotted him sitting outside of his bedroom door on the play mat, I saw a massive amount of blood flowing out of his mouth! Oh, my poor little boy! I asked Jocelyn what happened. She was covering her face and crying while hiding around the corner. In between sobs, she said that he jumped off the bookshelf with the tv on it and fell on the floor. I couldn't breathe and a million things were racing through my head. "Did he bite his tongue?" was my first thought. With so much blood, I had NO idea where it was coming from inside his mouth. I didn't know what to do either as panic started to set in. "Do I call 110 (emergency)?" He was conscious and to be honest, I wasn't sure what they'd be able to do so I ran and got a washcloth wet and placed it on his mouth while dialing John at work. Cell phone - nothing! Work phone - nothing! "Figures I can't reach him...it's an emergency!" I was so unprepared for this. I had no alternative number to call and reach him at work either. I remember sort of running around the room in circles going, "oh my gosh! oh my gosh! What do I do?????" All the while crying. I clearly wasn't helping to calm Andrew down by doing this. His crying escalated and I had to quickly collect myself! In my head, I thought, "GET IT TOGETHER WOMAN!!!!" 

Next option was to call my friend Christi down the street. Also a mother of four, and a mother of four BOYS at that! I knew she'd 1.) be able to help me if available and 2.) was most likely used to boys getting hurt! When I reached her on the phone, I was everything but calm! Not reaching John just about pushed me over the edge. But through tears, I tried to sum up what happened and she raced down the street to our house in what seemed like 30 seconds! It was fast, that's all I know! Meanwhile, she reached her husband at work and told him to go and locate John - that there was an emergency at home and he needed to call me! (I have since retrieved some emergency contacts at his work, heaven forbid should anything ever happen again and I can't reach him!)

I cleaned up some blood off Andrew's hands and face and continued to work on getting the bleeding to stop. I sat down with him snuggled on my lap at the table and fed him some Sherbet to help keep his mouth cold as he down right refused to eat a Popsicle. Meanwhile, Christi was fast on the phone with the base dental clinic. They said the clinic was closed (3:30pm!) and to go to the nearest emergency room.

Of course this had to happen on a Friday afternoon when everything was closed for the weekend!

Of course it did!

We knew that the hospital would most likely not be able to do much for a little boy hurting his mouth - except give us narcotics and send us home. The lady on the phone was so unwilling to help us. Christi told her, "So you're telling me that there is NO on-call dentist to help a little boy who hurt his mouth really bad? And that this kind of situation, especially with boys, has never happened in your entire time there on base that needed immediate attention? I find that hard to believe!" Quite frustrated at this point was an understatement! 

Christi stayed with me until I regained my composure and Andrew's mouth stopped bleeding. I was so relieved that she was there to help me when no one else was able to. So thankful for awesome friends! We were able to find the location of where all of this blood was coming from too. His top gums had been shoved up above his teeth pretty far. Some of his gum tissue had been rubbed off during the fall also and his frenulum looked to be torn. 

It was a short time before 7am on the west coast but my sister is a dental hygentist and I needed to reach her and tell her what happened. To see if she had any advice. Maybe also to just talk to my sister! This was such a heart wrenching situation! She asked some questions and then asked that I take a picture of his mouth and send it to her right away - to see if the dentist she worked for, as well as a few others she knew, could help in any way! It was pretty gruesome down right looked horrible! I found myself not able to look at this picture too long. I sent it right away! Erin and I talked about how amazing technology is these days. Who would have thought that you could one day email a photo of someone's mouth 7,000 miles away and get three separate Dentist's taking a look at it and giving their advice. All within a few hours! Pretty neat and crazy all at the same time. 

{I still get anxiety and feel nauseous looking at this picture! Poor little guy!}

Meanwhile, John hurried home from work and got on the computer and became quite the little investigator!! I was so glad he was home. I found comfort in him being there! He found a way to reach the MP's (military police) on base and they got in contact with the on-call dentist who then called us. After answering all the questions he needed answers to, he asked that we head to the clinic right away and would meet us there to examine Andrew's mouth. To also get some Tylenol or Motrin in his system to help minimize any swelling and pain. I took up Christi's offer and made arrangements for Jocelyn to stay at their house and play while we went and took care of Andrew. We also dropped Aubrey off at her school dance on the way.

I was an emotional wreck driving him to the dentist. We only got a few blocks away from the house when John offered to drive so we did a quick switch and got there about 30 minutes later. Not being behind the wheel, I was safe to think but I found myself not wanting to think! I know I didn't have any reason to feel this way as it clearly was an accident but I felt horribly guilty that I hadn't known what they were up to upstairs and couldn't have prevented it. I felt saddened for him getting hurt while under my watchful care. I wanted more than anything to take away his hurt and pain! To make him better again! While tears ran down my face, John didn't know how to comfort me which made me cry even more. Besides Andrew's two surgeries when he was a baby, nothing major has happened. Something tells me with him being my first boy, this is the first of many rough bumps in the road to come. Ugh!

We got to the clinic just as his assistant arrived. John offered to take Andrew in and let me stay in the van with Landon. I felt a little more guilty accepting this offer to stay back - I wanted to be there for my little boy more than anything - but honestly, I had had enough. I felt physically sick. It was safe to say that that day felt like a horribly no good day!

I had called my parents and Erin to update on how things were going. Erin mentioned that one of the dentist's said he needed stitches and emailed me the areas in his mouth that they needed to be placed. But when John returned with Andrew 45 minutes later, he said other than a thorough exam, nothing was necessary. While yes, his frenulum had been torn, it's not something that necessarily needs to be connected. That sometimes, it'll heal and connect on it's own again but if not, nothing harmful can come of it. Also, the two teeth that had been traumatized through the fall were a tiny bit wiggly but was ordered to only feed him soft foods for a while and that they should toughen back up. It was hard to say what was going to come of it. It was basically a waiting game at this point. We were told to call or bring him back in if his pain gets worse of if more bleeding occurs. I was hesitant with the care he received. I knew John was fully capable of taking care of our kids - so that's not what I was questioning. It was Andrew getting the opposite care that this dentist back in the States told us should happen. I didn't know what advice was best but since these dentists here practice the same general dentistry as they do back home, I figured I could trust what they were doing and know that Andrew was in good hands. Once I got back on the phone with my sister, she said that since we had last spoken, she got a hold of the pediatric dentist and he advised against the stitches. That an adult mouth would need them but not a young child. Their mouths tend to heal up very fast. After hearing this, I was so much more relieved! And Andrew became fast friends with the doctor on-call and refers to him as "his buddy!" Even drew him a picture and sent it to him with a thank you card!

Andrew having dinner after getting back from the dentist: Peaches & cream oatmeal.

Being hurt has it's advantages: All the sherbet, popscicles and ice cream you want! :)

For the most part, the next day, Andrew was back to his normal self and played like nothing had ever happened. Typical kid!

"What Mom? I'm fine!"

But me still a bit shaken and scared by what had happened, I felt protective and worried he'd try to do too much too fast. So I admit, for the first week or so, we took things A LOT easy! The first few days took a toll on his body and he slept here and there. We watched movies, built forts, went grocery shopping, colored in coloring books, played cars and trains...

And then he slipped and fell again on his mouth while turning in circles on the kitchen floor!! His socks must have helped him slip. He screamed, I checked his mouth and yup! It was bleeding again! Not as much but still!! I reacted more calm - probably helped with having some experience already. So out came more sherbet from the freezer and I quickly prepared him a bowl.

Then, another day, he bumped his mouth on a toy bin and he cried again. Thankfully, no bleeding this time.

This is when I joked (or was I?) that I wanted to mount a "cone of shame" around his head. Or lock him up in a padded room! This getting hurt business was becoming too much for this mama’s heart!

Friday night came and it was John and I's date night. I honestly didn't want to go anymore. I was afraid something would happen and I wouldn't be there to take care of him. Or prevent something from happening! But I was going crazy and desperately needed a break! But I knew I couldn't just sit around living in fear all the time and deserved this chance to get away. We were out for a few hours and once we came home, we learned from the sitter that he did indeed get hurt! Not majorly hurt, but enough to cause more damage to his mouth! I guess he was walking around with a toy in his mouth and our friend's daughter pulled hard on it trying to get it and in turn, loosened the teeth! It now appeared they would not firm back up as we hoped they would. And one slight touch to the two fragile teeth confirmed my fear: they were wiggling and barely hanging on! :(

Monday, I brought him into the clinic. Over the weekend, I didn't have a good gut feeling about it! I always try to listen to my motherly instinct and be in tune to what I should do. In 2 weeks time, this was the 4th trip to see the dentist and I was starting to feel like we were just short of living there!  They did an x-ray and found an abscess growing above the two damaged teeth. They needed to prep a room and extract them right away before infection spread even more. More guilt washed over me and I started to tear up. This was a different dentist and assistant and let's just say, they lacked good bedside manners and made a hard situation almost unbearable! (They later apologized to John after I left for how harsh they treated me!) 

John was on base getting groceries so he flew over when I called him to relay the news. I also had Jocelyn and Landon and needed his help. They were not very understanding why I brought my other children with me and that if I brought them again in the future, they'd deny us care or make us reschedule. Being new to a different country, you don't normally send your children off with complete strangers. Most of my friends here work or weren't available and really...wherever I go, my kids come with me. They are very obedient and I've never had a problem before. Granted, if it's MY appointment, I do find a sitter or John watches them for me.

He finished his pudding while they got his room ready...

Got some cuddles while waiting...

Had his teeth pulled in a matter of minutes, got a prescription for his mouth and then we traveled back home.

But as you can see, he was back to all smiles and feeling 10 times better! I was SO happy to see this cute smile on his face! It melted my heart and made me as a mother feel so much better!

He's so cute! We told him about putting his teeth under his pillow so the tooth fairy could come in the night and leave him some money for them. He did NOT like this idea. I then realized he IS a bit young for this sort of thing to usually happen. Normally, he wouldn't have lost his first tooth for a good couple of years from now so we decided he could keep his teeth AND some money! :)

And here are his two teeth he was so proud to carry around for the first few days:

And as much as I'd like to roll bubble wrap around his 3 year old body or have him wear a helmet, I will just let him be! Hahaha. As tempting as it is, I just can't protect him all the time as much as I'd like to. That wouldn't be fair, practical or right. But I WILL always keep a prayer close to my heart that he will be safe and well.

A few days later, we returned to the clinic to see how things were healing. A tiny bone fragment was left in his gums after extracting his two teeth. They said they could either surgically remove it, or let it fall out on its own. We chose the later of the two. Why make him go through all of that pain if not necessary?

Last week, I took all the kids in for their teeth cleanings. And as the dentist and I both thought, the tiny bone had fallen out and his gums firmed up and are healthy and doing fine. They'll be keeping a close watch on his mouth until the time comes he should be getting the permanent tooth in - around 7 or 8 years old. The dentist does feel that the nerves were damaged when hit on impact so it may grow in disfigured (not maturely developed) or could be discolored. Or something they didn't say: all could be well! We won't know until the permanent tooth decides to grow in and fill the holes. I'm confident that no matter what, things will be alright. 

 So far now, he has been given the nickname: Hockey player. And will be a good one for Halloween for, oh, the next 4 or 5 years! :)

P.S. A few weeks after Andrew's fall, Jocelyn was telling me how bad she felt for pushing Andrew off the shelf. I chose not to jump to any conclusions until finding out more about what she was talking about.

Mom: What do you mean, pushing Andrew off the shelf?

Jocelyn: Well, he was standing up there and I told him to get down but he wouldn't. So I went up there to try and get him down but he still wouldn't listen to me so I pushed him off.

Mom: Oh! Well, next time, come find Mom and I'll help him get down, okay? We don't push people because he could get hurt, like he did. So please make sure you don't push next time.

Jocelyn: Okay, Mom. I'm sorry!

So, it's true. She pushed him. But thankfully, she did it with the intention to help and NOT to hurt! And I'm glad I was able to remain calm and find out the story before full blown accusing her for hurting him when that was not her intent. I know it would have been easy to do!

This parenting business is HARD work! But SO worth it, too!

And as each day goes by, I love them more and more!

(How that is even possible, I do not know!) :)